Open your mind
Benny Greenberg at Ya-ttitude wrote a post called Open those Flood Gates and as I wrote my comment there I could feel a blog post coming on.
A closed mind is simply a sign of a static personality. It allows for all progress to simply pass you by! And as progress passes you by, so does opportunities and the ability for you to attain those goals and achievements you have set forth for yourself. The only way you can achieve all of your dreams and goals is for you to maintain an open mind; grasping this concept is another key to your overall success.
buddha
Faith isn’t religion
A religion is a set of tenets and practices, often centered upon specific supernatural and moral claims about reality, the cosmos, and human nature, and often codified as prayer, ritual, or religious law. And, at the top of the pyramid of the greatest barriers to making open minded decisions is the religious beliefs that we cling to.
Provided that you understand that I don’t have religion and I don’t mean religion, when I say “faith” then I do have faith. I have a great deal of faith in myself, in my own ability to make good decisions, and in the ability of my fellow beings to do likewise, and that’s all the faith I need.
Core beliefs
It’s a quirk of human nature that we maintain our beliefs by selectively exposing ourselves to information that we already know is likely to support those beliefs. Yet, when we remove the emotional elements and take the time to gather information on the opposite side of any issue we are more likely to come to different conclusions. This is why it’s not surprising that gut responses based on deeply held core beliefs are not always the most accurate.
Assess the emotional urgency factor
When faced with any decision I assess the “emotional urgency” factor first. I frequently find that urgency is artificially created by others, because they are relying on a specific outcome and desiring the instant gratification, if and when it’s confirmed. So whenever possible, I choose not to make hurried decisions prompted by artificial urgency to please or satisfy others.
Another dynamic that I have become aware of is the “important decision” categorization. I’m more likely to conduct a broad based and open minded investigation of all possibilities if I assign high importance to the decision in terms of outcomes and impacts.
In cases of “important decision making” I seek out more information, I consult others and listen to their points of view, and I make lists of pros and cons, as well as possible outcomes and impacts. Whenever possible I choose to assign high importance to issues where the outcome of the decision made is likely to have a major impact on finances and /or relationships.
A mind opening process
(1) I benefit from trying to see the situation as and an inquisitive child might view it. I try to see everything as if it’s the first time, and try to think about it in new ways.
(2) I benefit from writing down my goals and doing some planning for each of them.
(3) I sometimes focus too much on details and not enough on the big picture. By reviewing my dreams I can monitor where I’m at and notice opportunities that I have overlooked.
(4) I’m aware that every decision I make is based on my core beliefs. To open my mind I review my core beliefs and quiz myself about each one by asking myself why I believe it. Next I imagine that I don’t exactly believe it any more, but instead believe something marginally different, and then marginally different again.
(6) My core beliefs are unique to me and my friend’s core beliefs are unique to them. An open mind is comfortable with the differences, and also capable of using a variety of lenses to view any issue from many angles. So I ask close friends to share their core beliefs with me and how they acquired them.
(7) I need to make sure I take enough time to enjoy the decision making journey so I don’t reach my destination only to find that the outcome I was hoping for has eluded me yet again. That means I need to be sure my dreams and goals for various parts of my life are recorded in mission and vision statements, and I need to review them regularly to verify that they are in alignment.
Dedications
This post is dedicated to the following bloggers:
buddhaofhollwood
everyoneneedstherapy
geoffreysplace.net
guidetolifeblog
lifeasiknowit22.blogspot.com
melindaville.com
pentads
Pricilla Palmer Personal Development Blog List
the happiness project
thinksimplenow.com
writetosurvive
zen habits
Very interesting technique. Research always helps to open you to the possibilities of a different outcome. I rely on that and listening to other opinions or others who’ve made the ‘wrong’ decision as only they can judge. Dreams tap into our subconscious in ways we don’t understand, so why not use them. I’ve had a Buddhist client tell me they need to dream first about major decisions on something as ‘ordinary’ as a choice of designs for a CD cover. Thanks for sharing what works for you.
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It amazes me how many people can’t be open to other people’s beliefs…me included at times. After watching the presidential election I realized that only about 50% of people likely agree with my opinions on most topics. Whether I am right or wrong, or they are right or wrong is not really what is important. What is really important is that we learn to discuss our belief systems in a progressive, open, honest, and educational manner.
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Thank you for this. I find I’m getting too crotchety in my middle-age. Sometimes I need reminders like this to keep my mind more flexible. :)
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What you said about Core Beliefs is 100% true. In fact I believe that you can trace most of the world’s problems to the knee jerk reactions that people and countries have because they don’t think things through.
To never question yourself, your beliefs, your attitude, and your direction in life is just plain lazy. Decisions that you made 20 years ago were made with limited information that you probably expanded on. The problem of course is that most people are lazy.
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You are a sharp lady. I noticed that you were a lady of “detail”, however, I sense that you do actually have that larger picture with you at all times. It’s your attention to detail that leads to the excellency in whatever I observe you create.
This was a neat post. Thank you for sharing a little more about you.
I am so with you on that last number 7. That hit home.
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@SBA
I agree with you about dreams. Everyone dreams and dreams often contain significant information for us, putting light on what has happened in our lives, or what is happening and providing insights into our future. I have been recording my dreams for many years. I don’t record every one but I do find that my night dreams do inform me in a way that daydreaming doesn’t.
@Doc Nicole
What a great quote. Thanks for sharing it.
What is really important is that we learn to discuss our belief systems in a progressive, open, honest, and educational manner.
@Lana
I have never viewed you as being “crotchety”. I have always found you to be frank, open and honest. :)
@potato chef
Boy you said it all. We get become entrenched, we manifest knee jerk reactions and fail to examine our core beliefs. Why? Because we prefer to be are lazy nad habitual rather than mindful. Thanks for commenting.:)
my english is very good,but i think your blog is truth and intereting.
:):)
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I agree re lazy habits of mind, though I’d love to have you explore how culture influences our core beliefs, our very flexibility as humans that make us fit into/accept the variety of cultures we’re born into and their beliefs that too often become “core beliefs.” Your thoughtfulness would be welcome in looking at how tolerant can we be before we lose those core beliefs. I believe in tolerance, but obviously, if I tolerate everything, I will betray what I think is right. I think I’m combining 2 different posts of yours, and I apologize for that. But I look at the US and Obama having Rev. Rick Warren speak at his inauguration, an evangelical preacher that compared gay marriage to a human wanting to marry an animal, a man who made up a PEACE award for Bush re Aids “work” in Africa, and I am torn: is this understanding, tolerance, or is it betrayal of core beliefs? I hope all this fits, and if not, I understand not posting.
r,k., the tricksters last blog post..Black Friday in the Red
Hi RK
I look at the US and Obama having Rev. Rick Warren speak at his inauguration, an evangelical preacher that compared gay marriage to a human wanting to marry an animal, a man who made up a PEACE award for Bush re Aids “work” in Africa, and I am torn: is this understanding, tolerance, or is it betrayal of core beliefs? I hope all this fits, and if not, I understand not posting.
I have allowed myself to become embroiled in and poisoned by American politics since March of 2008. I am disgusted by Obama’s choice.
I think people has become too complacent nowadays. With all this modern technology and all, it seems we have been a society of sheep. Unknowing or unwilling to try and change ourselves.
@avideogameplayer
I agree :)