Eight Suggestions for Improving Your Relationships

By brightfeather on August 26th, 2007

Here is another sample of what Dr. Gabriella Kortsch is a psychotherapist, clinical hypnotherapist, relationship coach, author, and professional speaker has to say.

Realize that attraction, love, chemistry, and emotion, come about due to the psycho-emotional and spiritual makeup of your inner man or woman precisely in order that you may work on these and develop further. It is your psyche’s way of helping to make you whole. That is why relationships are of such enormous importance in personal growth and development.
Always watch any kind of “affect” (emotion, both negative and positive) … it gives strong clues to where you need to work on something (even if it proves the other person is a heel). But if you were “whole”, your affect would not get involved. (See also June 2007 Newsletter - The Mirror of Relationships).
Analyze arguments, NOT from the point of view of how egotistical, horrible, jealous, or domineering, etc. your partner is, but from the point of view of what the argument is telling you about YOURSELF. The other may indeed be all those things, but it is much less important to dwell on their failings than on your own possibility for growth by observing your reactions to whatever is occurring.
Use that knowledge to change, grow, and learn that you always have a choice in your reaction to any situation.
Become very aware of yourself at ALL times … watch the times you would like to prevaricate, or at least, tell things in a way that is not 100% the real way, and try to discover why … are you afraid you will not be accepted or loved if you show your real self?
Particularly watch those relationships that have an imbalance of power … if you are top dog … ask yourself what you get out of it … if you are on the bottom … why you are willing to be there … the answer to all of this serves your growth … remember, it takes two to tango!
Develop a sense of self by filling your own needs rather than by trying to fill them through others. Love yourself first!
Observe yourself in a love relationship on the basis of this article.